Each of the groups tend to hang around only with members of the same groups, and they all have their own bars, parties, music, customs, ways of dress, and intricate mating rituals. These aren't the stereotypes of the world at large, they are the ones we have invented for ourselves, and they are just as reductive. There are plenty that fit the mold for each squarely, but most are really a combination of the types, or like to think of themselves as individuals, even though they still have many of the traits from one of the pre-selected identities. It's like saying that every woman is either a Carrie, Charlotte, Miranda, or Samantha. To say that each gay person belongs to one of these types is a bit deceptive. They may not be very familiar to the world at large, but they are certainly familiar to the brothers in butt fucking. That's right, we have our own stereotypes for each other, and they're much more specific than you can ever imagine. That said, when the gays see a fellow homosexual in the public sphere, we try to plug them into the convenient taxonomy the community has made for itself. A queer will tell you that we are all individuals and that those stereotypes are false and horrible.
Just like the world at large may stereotype gays as mincing wrist flippers with great taste bent on giving everyone they meet a make over. It is actually broken down into a handful of substrata to which each gay belongs. So when people refer to the community in other orders, such as GLBT, they are unintentionally ignoring the struggles and importance of lesbians in the community.The gay world is often represented as some sort of monolithic whole that has the same culture.
The lesbian community through their struggles and important role in the community, have more than earned their spot as the first letter in LGBTQ. With both the men and women of the community being far more receptive to feminist ideas, the push to have the “L” come first went relatively smoothly. The increased solidarity between the two groups led to a rise in feminism in both lesbians and gay men. This was a show of lesbians’ willingness to support gay men in their time of need and sparked a closer, more supportive relationship between both groups. They were also a massive part of the activism surrounding the gay community and AIDS at the time. Lesbians were the ones helping gay men with medical care. While a huge portion of gay men were suffering from AIDS, the lesbian community was largely uneffected. The AIDS crisis also factored into the “gay/lesbian solidarity” that led to lesbians being more recognized in the community. The push to change the order came with the surge of feminist ideas that sprouted in the 80s and 90s. Where comical gay men, as poor as the representation may be, were fairly common in the 90s and the 2000s, lesbians aside from the occasional gal pals and Ellen, were few and far between and were never main characters. Although the representation of gay men is often horribly stereotypical, lesbians, especially in the decades before this one, have hardly been represented at all. Lesbians are also historically underrepresented in media (though trans people probably have it even worse) when compared to gay men. And this is not made up for with lesbian spaces. There is a large amount of harassment that occurs in these bars. Gay bars are common spots in big cities, however lesbians are consistently not included in these spaces. From the fact that there has always been a lack of spaces catered to lesbians when compared to gay men. The LGBT community despite being inherently inclusive, has always had pockets of sexism. There was a focus on men’s issues and lesbians (as well as trans people of both genders) were largely unrecognized, hence the common GLBT acronym. In the starting stage of the gay rights movement, gay men were largely the ones running the show. The “L” comes first in the acronym for a reason. The order was also changed from its original fluctuating, GLBT or LGBT, state to the set LGBTQ term we know today. The acronym has also changed and evolved through the years, adding various letters (such as the Q for queer and the A for asexuality) as new identities started being acknowledged. The LGBTQ+ acronym is the most common term used to refer to the community based around sexuality and gender minorities.